Written 'Tussin to combat the ill-effects of the mundane 9 to 5.
Tuesday, August 4, 2009
iPhone Lust
On Saturday I signed a two-year contract. As a result, AT&T (with all of its dropped calls and shortcomings) owns the majority of my life, with Steve Jobs claiming the remnants. My phone, unlike me, is now smart. Here's to iSheeple.
The author of the Scriptural Apothecary gets paid to communicate his ideas using the written word, but hardly considers himself a capable writer.
The author thinks his life to this point has been a series of "phases." He currently resides on the Upper East Side of Manhattan and recently convinced himself to give up masturbation as a preventative measure for his eyesight, on account of his Catholic guilt. He believes posting to this blog will suffice as mental masturbation, you know, until he enters the next phase of his life.
When the author isn't portraying himself in a self-indulgent light he can be found at the bar. Feel free to approach him with a beer, but be forewarned - he will defend Salinger as a great American author as he mixes with hops and barley.
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