Child's Play

Setting: Hot summer day in Bay Ridge - Brooklyn, at the Fort Hamilton High School Park, during 2007. The S.A. is "running game" on the basketball courts, and is witness to the following:

A young boy is a spider-monkey-in-training performing countless feats of strength on the Jungle Gym. [Mr. Softee's signature jingle rouses all of the children in the park causing a dispersion and a mad scramble to muster $2.50, which in many cases meant the children nagging their parents.]

Spider Monkey: Mommy, can I have some ice cream?
Mother: The Ice Cream Man only plays that song when he's out of ice cream. Besides, I brought you carrots and a juice box. [Spider monkey drops his head in disappointment, and is puzzled to see other children grinning ear to ear while indulging in a Sponge Bob Square Pants pop.]

Truth be told, the S.A. was paying attention and considers this a brilliant move (albeit terribly cruel). He has filed it away and will consider unveiling this tactic when he needs to outwit his future spawn.